I'll throw this behind a cut in case people don't feel like reading about me sleeping.

( So, this dream I had. )

Quick hits:
In first-time news, I'm on my way to Fenway this Sunday, Sunday, SUNDAY, for the first time since I've moved here. My brother is in town for a wedding this weekend, and we get to hang out Sunday before he goes back to WA on a Monday morning redeye.

New articles up by Those Beer Snobs. Anything you want to see up there? Lemme know! It's like a 21st birthday bar crawl, I'll drink what you say and buy it myself. You can't lose!

I want some dinner and beers tonight. Hmm.

Well, after waking up at 4 this morning for a 7a flight, waiting in the Ft Lauderdale airport for an extra 2 hours b/c my in-laws' flight out of NY was delayed, and checking in to the hotel, we have finally arrived in sunny Florida for our 5-day relaxing vacation. I'm looking forward to seeing what the local supermarkets have in the way of "not-budweiser," if anything. To paraphrase Lewis Black, "There's not enough [beer] for this [weekend]." The hotel is nice; right now the lawn guys are here cropping and mowing everything in advance of the holiday weekend. I forgot that freshly-mowed southern lawn smells different than freshly-mowed northern lawn.

The last time I was in Florida was three years ago. The time before that was in the later '90s somewhere. Due to having former family living down here when I was a kid, my parents, brother, and I would be down here twice a year, every year when I was growing up (and even into middle- and high-school). Even with all that time, the palm trees, wide-bladed thick grass, and the smell of the dense heat still seem so familiar. And even though I'm down here visiting new family, it kind of makes me miss the old family a little more.

...with apologies to Phil Collins.

Coffee ice cream was a resounding success! It's even got little specks of finely ground coffee through it, kind of like the way Breyer's vanilla has the bean specks dotting it, but finer. With some caramel sauce it tastes just like your favorite Turtle coffee drink from that coffee shop near college; you know the one. I am very proud of myself. Blended in a shake form with some hi-octane Kahlua and quality vanilla vodka or rum would be sweet, delicious lethality.

Tonight it's off to see TMBG again. But this time, the internet is rumbling with the rumors that it'll be a Flood show. If that turns out to be true that'd be awesome. In 13 years of seeing them, I've never seen a Flood show. With their reliance on new material for 70% of show set lists these days, it would be nice to see them bust out some classics.

Wow, it's really been a while since I've posted something. Yeesh. But then, there's not too much I've done. If I've seemed anti-social, I apologize. Not much to report on. Still need to see Trek; I think I need to get out of the house more in general. If I was sitting in a cube for 8 hours a day at this point, I'd most likely be lamenting the fact that I couldn't get out and do something. It seems that not being tethered to the cube has itself become an even heavier weight. That doesn't seem right.

Anyway, few points of note. There's a few new articles up on Those Beer Snobs. And tonight is my first time experimenting with making ice cream. Since Brooklyn Chocolate Stout is out of season at the moment, my inaugural batch is of the NA variety. If this is a success, the next experiment will involve a different beer's flavorings. I'm excited!

I'm also toying with the idea of starting an actual (non-LJ) blog. We'll see.

So I checked out the other thing that some peeps have alluded to, and...yeah. While it still has that new-site smell to it, it looks the same to me as anything else. In the 7 or 8 times I hit "Random," to give me an idea of who was around, there seemed to be some weird Internet Homestead Act going on, with people putting down their 'here first' stakes and talking about how this one was gonna be great. People are so friendly here! Give it a week. This is the Internet we're talking about here.

Now, here's the other thing. Here's where the title of this post comes from. Last weekend, the AVN awards were on Shotime at midnight. We found them through flipping channels around 1:15 or so. They are hilarious. Every other girl had on one of those mullet shaped dresses (short in the front, train in the back), and those that didn't had on feather outfits that looked like they were rejects from Bjork's closet. As the show wound down, there would be pre-produced segments in between the award presentations (like what MTV does for their award shows, or a SNL Digital Short). The last one done was one of the funniest parodies I've seen in a while. Melding together two of America's tried-and-true traditions--the infomercial and porn--we the viewing audience were treated to this. Link is NSFW, doy.

Four more job applications sent out today! Back with a vengeance after being sick for a month. Hi-YAAHH!

...well, until I hit my funeral or 65, whichever comes first.

I've had a headache for most of today. It kind of feels like when you drink for the Three Too's (too much, too fast, too early), and your hangover hits later that same day, hours before you were thinking of going to bed. Ugh. Please, dear body, don't relapse into the garbage you put me through last week.

While out this past weekend some people expressed a lack of knowledge of the beer project TDL and I work on. Well, for those that don't know, you can read some nonsense I write over at Those Beer Snobs. Tom is my friend from NY, I'm BigShow, and TBG is That Bootleg Guy. Good God, I think that's the most blog site pimped paragraph I've ever written.

Oh! Check this out. So today, while getting back into the job search mix, I ask Media Player to throw me together an audio-cd-length playlist of favorites. And goddam if the thing did spit out a damn fine mix. I totally would have put this cd together, but never thought of it. The computers are smarter!

1) Ordinary Day [live] - Great Big Sea
2) Little By Little - Oasis
3) The Night Pat Murphy Died - Great Big Sea
4) On and On - Longpigs
5) Last Hour of the Last Day of Work - Less Than Jake
6) Liquor Store - Less Than Jake
7) Faint - Linkin Park
8) Museum of Idiots - They Might Be Giants
9) Revelry - Sea Ray
10) Voices Carry - 'Til Tuesday
11) Ball and Chain - Social Distortion
12) Info-Freako - Jesus Jones
13) The Old Black Rum [live] - Great Big Sea
14) Gypsy - Suzanne Vega

Granted, I tend to mix cds with only one artist per song, but that's a great mix!

And now, I need to try and figure out what I'm going to do this weekend.

I got bored looking at the same new icon post when I hit 'recent entries,' so here you go.

Spring is creeping into the air, which at one time meant it was time to think about unearthing the shorts, putting away the flannel pajamas, and gearing up for summer concerts. I'm finding that as I get older, and the concert ticket industry reaches dystopian levels of monopolization, it's just not worth it to take in the shows. For example, this past weekend I got myself psyched up to buy tickets for the NIN|JA tour--a summer explosion of nine inch nails touring with a rejuvenated Jane's Addiction. The closest (so far) that they were getting here was out at the Great Woods/Tweeter/Comcast/Whateverthefuck Center, and I'm always up for sitting on the lawn seeing a good show. As I do, I forgot about the show until Sunday, and headed over to LiveNation to see just how gouged I'd get. Whatever it was, I thought, it won't be that bad. Lawn seats were 18 bucks. Sweet, I can totally do that. I really don't need to be right on top of the band (the furthest seats under the roof were in the high 30s). Plus, the times that stage effects are used, they're better seen from a distance anyway, due to them being enormous. So I pick two lawns, input the cod sEcreT as I see it, and then see this:

Ticket: $18
Combined fees (yep, there's two of them) per ticket: $16

I tried. I tried for upwards of a half hour to justify to myself, making this purchase. And in the end, I couldn't. Two tickets to a show would cost me nearly four tickets to the same show. After all of it, I realized that for about 2/3 less of the total ticket price, I'll be able to buy the inevitable DVD release and watch it on a 50" TV in surround sound. But it sucks, having to turn down one of your favorite bands due to garbage ticket gouging.

In an unrelated story, I got new glasses last week. They're cyborg glasses--they turn into sunglasses when they get sunlight on them. bunnyroo is freaked out by this. I think that's adorably hilarious. The cyborg thing is also good b/c I'm out of contacts, but light on money these days, so now I'll automatically have sunglasses when I go outside.

For those interested, there's been no job progress yet. I did a lot of reflection this past week and weekend on my mental blocks regarding certain industries, and with no actual proof that I can't do something, I think it may be time to start a really different career path.

Actually got a good deal accomplished today. I still need to do my writeup of the Chelsea Cask Fest (seeing as I'm already two weeks home from it). I'm pretty much shored up with my Iron Chef offerings for this weekend. Got some more to do with my ongoing cassettes-to-mp3 project--mebbe I'll do some of that as a reward for my productivity today.

Finally got my beer icon. Woo. Just a few quick hits today:

-Been rejected now from two of the more prominent Boston consulting firms. That kind of sucks. As far as a new career direction goes, consulting seemed to have all of the things I'd love to do in it: working on a small equivocally-bright team, research, problem-solving, and a good wage.

-Highlights of the Less Than Jake show on Sunday:
1) They used the Star Wars theme as their entrance music, then proceeded to play it themselves once they were all on stage.
2) A good mix of old and new stuff, including the [according to them] not-often-played "I Think I Love You."
3) Lots of witty banter with each other and with the crowd. It's always fun to see a band have as much fun with themselves as the crowd does with them. As Roger put it, "We've been on spring break since 1996!"
4) They played this song! Yes, that song!



-Two-minute time waster is up on Beer Snobs. See what your favorite local brewers said to placate me and get me out of their hair!

-See? Told you it'd be quick hits.

It's funny...somehow going out and having a great time at a show makes the next day somewhat equivalent to staying up and drinking alone until 4 in the morning. Actually, that's somewhat inaccurate--as my head clears and my throat opens up again I don't have that sort of dull ache throughout the muscles and bones that accompanies late nights of drinking in your 30s. We caught the St. Pat's Dropkick Murphys show last night, and it was great. I much prefer the House Of Blues over the Agannis and the Lowell arenas--it was good to see the band back in a smaller venue. Of course, I padded my enjoyment of the show with a few drinks of Powers Irish Whiskey here beforehand, but that just helped. :) I yelled, cheered, and sang along. A good time. Though, my body abruptly woke me up at 7a this morning because I needed water NOW. Luckily, all it took to cool the burned throat was a few glasses and back to sleep I went.

Now, what to do with today. I need to finish up the beer/brewer column I pressed people for info for. And I need to relax before tomorrow's Less Than Jake show, when I'll most likely put myself through the ringer again. This is shaping up to be a not-bad weekend.

And to shake it up a bit, here's that "Google "Unfortunately, " thing, with an added twist of "Although, ":

Unfortunately, Michael discovers Nellie’s hands-on approach is more than he...although he was named for Pele and raised to be a soccer star
Scott Pilgrim is being played by, unfortunately, Michael Cera...although he's likely out for season.
Unfortunately, Mike's Love Doesn't Fix Elevators. Although he has a lot of potential, his attitude towards his studies is having a negative effect on his progress/learning.
These are brilliant. but unfortunately Michael was a woman who lied to himself...although he would have liked to have done so.
Unfortunately, Michael’s family began having serious financial problems. Although he liked Oxford.
Unfortunately, Michael is quite right. One could wish it were not so, but that won't change the fact. Thanks. Although he was quite ill during the last few years of his life...
Unfortunately Michael Steele and the rest of the GOP are and have been MIA for the last 4 years. Although he is as gifted as...
Unfortunately, Michael Jackson is a very smart business man. Although he's been very busy looking at development sites in New York and other parts of the country...

Justin Timberlake will do anything Samberg or Lorne asks him to.

I've started digitizing some of my old cassettes as a project concurrent with my job searching and to get my mind off of the aforementioned search. Some of this stuff is really great. I even came across some really old stuff in my empty beer case and shopping bag full of tapes. It's kind of a fun project! After this, it's on the the VHS stuff. Next time I'm home I need to get my father-in-law to show me how to use his VCR/DVD recorder. So I've got my afternoon set, we'll see what later brings.

I've taken to having some inspriation items in the office here when I do my job search; I'm hoping they help. Over on the other side of the room is my Goonies laser ball as well as my blue lava lamp, and Ram Man, hanging out on my desk.

I'm finding the hardest part of doing this searching is that I still don't really know what I want to DO*. I mean, I know what I CAN do, and I'm a pretty quick study when given something new to learn, but it's tough searching through finance jobs and finding the most interesting-looking things neededing years of accounting and GAAP experience I don't have. Oh well, onward we go. Found a few financial analyst postings today that may be worth looking in to. Onward we go, and more coffee!






*This is actually not entirely true. A while back TDL asked me to, off the cuff, name the jobs I'd most want to do, in order of perceived practicality. That list went something like Voiceover Announcer; Voice Actor; Brewer; and Singer. So, yeah.

So Schmap has decided that I'm good enough to be featured in their archives. Yay!

http://www.schmap.com/boston/sights_southend/p=17360/i=17360_48.jpg (It's in the Boston Public Library group of photos)

...telling your wife that you both should go see that band you like, and they're even playing in town soon! only for her to gently smile at you and remind you that tickets for that very show are sitting in the nightstand.

Woo! Less Than Jake in March!

So, TDL was nice enough to let me guest-write his Friday Beer Snob column over at his corner of the internets, so I figured I'd post it here as well. The ranking system can be found here. Enjoy!

( Friday Beer Snob: Edinburgh Ale by Innis & Gunn )

Wow, two in one day!

While I'm not really a "Hey! Hey you! Hey, look at my FOOD!" guy, I must posterity-post this momentous occasion. I made a bread! I made a beer bread! I can sustain life along fertile river deltas! Behold, the rustic-ity! (Is that a word? Who cares!)



...Just wanted to share. It was really easy (Of course it was easy, dolt; it's BREAD. -ed.). Some flour, baking powder, salt, sugar, egg, and beer. I chose a Blue Point Oktoberfest for my initial test loaf. And I think it worked out great. Next time, I'll try to smooth the top of the dough out in the pan so I don't get the crazy Edward James Olmos effect of the crust there.

One more random thought. Listening to music in the dark w/ just my desk lamp on makes me feel like I'm somehow back in college.

I now have all fifty of the state quarters, snuggled away in their individual spots in my collecting book. Yay!

Also, here's that ( Greatest TV Shows meme )

So I started working out today, and the nice lady on the dvd proceeded, inside of 40 minutes, to give me a charley horse and a whole slew of muscle pain.

Actually, I should ( back up a few weeks for this story to make any sort of sense. )

So...now we're up to speed. And after this weekend (since I'll be home), I totally want to hang out. So let's do that!

Well, this is a few days late, but I attribute that to the fact that I'm down 2 wisdom teeth as of last Thursday, and it's hard to think about things when you feel like someone's punched you in the mouth repeatedly. Anyway, I would like to take this opportunity to wish a very happy belated birthday to our good friend PeaPie!

Yes, it was three years ago on 1/14 that a select few of us were introduced to this Samson-esque superhero(?), who draws his immense strength from his incredible powers of autofellatio. Strong to the finish, indeed.

So happy creation, PeaPie. May you continue to be just as inspiring as you are surreal.

More to come later on, when I take some of my sweet scrip meds. Damn this pain.

The last few weeks have completely murdered my internal calendar. Starting on 12/22, it was 2 days of work, then 2 days off, then one day of work, then the weekend, then three days of work, then 2 days off (one of which was my doctor appt), then the weekend. I went to bed last night thinking that I had to wake up this morning for work. The fact that the alarm went off at 8 didnt do much to help. Plus, I got a vaccine and blood drawn yesterday so now I'm weakened and have bogus-tetanus. It's a great time to be me!

Actually, I feel fine today, aside from the off-again, on-again not knowing what day it is. Oh, and I want this thing, which just came down from 150 to ninety bucks.

We finally finished the first season of How I Met Your Mother on Friday. Only one-and-a-third more seasons to catch up on and we'll be totally caught up! After that, I need to set aside about a quarter of a year to catch up on Lost, although at this point I'm sure I'll never wind up doing that. It'll be one of those shows that I see in rerun years from now, and say, "Man, I would've totally watched that when it was first on. Why didn't I?" Oh well. I don't have that many Saturdays free, it seems. Not when there's other things taking up upcoming Saturdays in the near future. Things like:

-The Saturday Night Live Saturday Day DVD marathon!
-The Mad Men "Suit"-erday all-day Martini bar crawl!
-The NYC Blind Tiger/Nancy Whiskey's/TriBeCa Tavern triumverate!
-Um...cleaning?

Now, am I going up to the border for cheap booze today or not...? That is the question!